as i think about moving and the effects it has on everyone i've come to some conclusions:

it's always much harder on the leavEE (i know, not a word) than the leavER. the person who has made this decision to leave, be it a move or a visit away or something, has been mentally preparing for this. they decided to make changes and expect things to be different. the poor leavEE didn't make any such decision to make changes in their life and yet, they still must feel the consequences of a choice made by another.

so, let me just say this, as the leavER i've been planning this for quite some time. and though i've let everyone in on our plans for many months i know it's still different for my friends and family that i'm leaving behind. i'm getting ready for a new adventure and will be so busy getting settled in and exploring my new area and making new friends for awhile that it will probably take a little time to settle in that i've left so many of the people i love behind. i mean, i know that intellectually right now, but i will be too busy for a while to really feel it. at the same time i can hear the sad and hurt from the people i love as they tell me how hard it's going to be for them to see us go. 

i want you, please, to know that though i'm not overly emotional, i do feel the same way you do. it's just a different process for me, on this side. i'm also very very grateful to know that i am loved and that we'll be missed. leaving the people i love here is really the only hard part of leaving for me. the only thing sadder than leaving is leaving and having no one to miss and no one who will miss you. 

so, thank you for caring! thank you for making this just a little difficult to leave. :)

:)

some things are too important to share only once

I posted this on FB a few days ago. Sadly, it got no responses or even likes. We love the short, funny things that give us a giggle, but anything that takes more than a few minutes is just too much time. I myself, am really guilty of this. But this is far too important to ignore. Yes, it's kind of long, but it is about our future. About how evil is triumphing because good man are standing by, doing nothing. Please, make some time to watch this and sign the petition. We need to do everything in our power to stop the destruction of families.

unfortunately, i can't get the video to embed, so i just posted the site address. Please, please, watch it.

http://www.overruledmovie.com/

Happy Anniversary to my Eternal Companion

happy 8th anniversary to my sweetheart!

yep, it's already been 8 years? how? when? it sure doesn't feel like it's been that long. and i take that as a good sign. they same time flies when you're having fun, and though it hasn't all been fun, i very strongly feel that our blessings have far outweighed our trials in the last 8 years together. there are so many reasons i love him, and today i am even more happy with my decision to marry him than i was 8 years ago. we have 4 beautiful children together and lots of great memories. when i think of my future i'm excited to see what will come about through the years. i'm excited to share new adventures and new experiences with him and our kids. 

these are just a few of the reasons i love him:

he's wonderfully, amazingly supportive of anything and everything i do or want to do.

he loves me unconditionally and has never made me feel second to anything or anyone.

he's slow to anger and quick to forgive.

he's a very hard worker, but still knows how to balance work and family.

he makes me feel pretty. =)

he's a worthy priesthood holder who never hesitates to serve us and others.

he's a good friend and a great listener.

he's always willing to try something i like, just because i like it.

he's a good sport and enjoys friendly competition.

we work well together.

there's so many more. i wrote him a four-page letter with so many things in it, and as i sit here i'm thinking of so many i left out. the list is very very long and always growing. 

i'm so glad i married the right man, at the right time, in the right place.

Happy New Year!

2012 already? is it just me or did 2011 kind of fly by? the last three years since we've been in this house have kind of blurred together and things that happened 3 years ago feel like they just happened yesterday. but i'm grateful for the new year. it always brings a feeling of refreshment and renewal even though it's such a simple thing.


we're officially on our countdown to move, and now that the holidays are over i'm starting to get antsy. i think paul is as well. while there is still a lot of uncertainty and lingering questions, the promise of a new adventure and blessings is a strong motivator. i'm glad we have 4 or 5 more weeks to get packed and prepared, but i know the time will go by quickly.


while our circumstances haven't changed much, i'm super grateful that we haven't had to suffer through many of the things i've seen people around me going through. our finances are always a concern, but we haven't had to deal with much on top of that really. relatively speaking, we've had it easy i think, so i guess i'm grateful that i lack the spiritual strength to be tried by more than one major thing at a time. i've had a happy, healthy family, and all of our needs have always been met, and sometimes even our simple wants.


i can't wait to move on and share our new adventure with everyone. i don't know what's waiting for us up in oregon, but somehow i think it is about far, far more than just a job. wish us luck!

growing up near both sets of grandparents, we had pretty set traditions for when and where we celebrated holidays. but christmas morning was always just us, the immediate family. and i loved growing up that way. i've kind of taken it for granted that it would be the same for my kids. i mean, i never expected to stay here in the central valley my whole life, but i hadn't really thought about what that meant in terms of holidays and specific things we'd be giving up or moving away from. 

christmas this year has been really really great. it's been fun, we've had a lot of special teaching moments with the kids, i've felt the meaning of christmas more than any other year and things were relaxed and enjoyable. but last night, on the way home from my mom's i had a realization. this year will be the last year, at least for the foreseeable future, that we will be able to do christmas morning together as a family and still be within driving distance of family, especially parents.

and that made me a little sad.

we will either have our christmas morning as a family or christmas with extended family. we will no longer be able to have the blessing of both. and i will miss that. i will especially miss that for my kids.

but i'm grateful for all the years we have been able to enjoy such a blessing and my kids have too, even though they won't remember it.

christmas on sunday

i have a confession to make. when i first discovered that christmas was on a sunday this year i was disappointed. 


on a different, but related note, i've really wondered, like i never have how to make this holiday real and important to my kids. how can i make sure that they really understand why we celebrate christmas? they're really young, but if we don't teach them now it won't mean too much later. i want them knowing from as early as they can remember that christmas is for charity and family and service and reflection.


i, myself have felt very reflective this year and felt the true meaning of christmas a little more this year than i ever have in my 26 christmases. as i struggled with how to convey to them how truly important christmas is, i realized having christmas on sunday is perfect. what better way to teach them that christmas is about Christ than to actually worship in Christ's house? 


actually writing that (and re-reading it) makes me feel silly because so many people already know that, that's why they have midnight mass and other special church services on christmas day. but because we live our religion more than some we don't consider it essential to actually be in church on christmas to celebrate and show our respect. but i do consider it a bonus and hope that it will help to show my children how important christmas--and all that it represents--is to me.