he's the man

for a little extra cash paul got a job two nights a week cleaning. one night he does a toyota dealership and the next he does a diner and the local bowling alley. since mom and chuck were here for thanksgiving, i went with him last night, and let me tell you, that was a whole new experience. not the cleaning part, but seeing the whole inside of a car dealership. including the service garage, the locker rooms, and the boss's private bathroom including a shower and a dresser.

the first thing i thought when we got there and paul started pulling out cleaning stuff was "wow, this sucks." which i said out loud. paul said "you didn't have to come, it's okay." but that's not what i meant. i meant, wow this sucks that after working so hard to get through years of schooling while having kids and working part time for bad minimum wage while still taking out student loans that he still has to take a night job cleaning to make ends meet. kind of. it sucks that he has a degree to do something he loves and instead does jobs that are very boring and un-stimulating because that's what he has to do to take care of his family.

 i loved him all the more at that moment, and now probably every time he continues to go out to clean and go to his regular day job because it's all we've got right now.

and you know what? he never complains. other than occasionally saying things like "i hate retail." (who can blame him?). he just does it because it has to be done. because, seriously, he's the man. oh yeah, and then, on top of that, after he's been out cleaning until 3:00 a.m. he gets up in the morning to take keith to school or feed the kids breakfast and when i tell him to get some sleep he says things like "but i want to be with you!"

if he has to work anyway--and he does because we're poor and don't have any money to our names--then i sure wish he could be doing something he loves. something that pushes him each day. something that gives him the chance to grow and magnify his talents. daddy that's happy after a rewarding day at work is much more fun than daddy who's bored and frustrated and doesn't ever want to talk about work. and i want him to be happy.

so, for this reason, and many others, i am really, really hoping paul gets this job. but either way, i hit the jackpot. seriously, this guy is gold.