So I've been saying for weeks how tired I am of being pregnant and how I'm so ready to have this baby out. And I am . . . or I thought I was.
Monday night I started having some very strong contractions and though they were erratic I was starting to wonder if maybe the time had come. And as it did, I started to get scared. Is that weird? Well, it probably is, but I guess it finally hit me, like REALLY hit me. I think part of the fear is the unknown of the labor and delivery part. Will I be able to have a successful VBAC or will I labor uselessly for hours only to have to be cut open again? The other part I think is that I guess I just realized, like really realized, that it will no longer be just me and Keith and Paul. There will be four of us. Last time, by the time I was a week late I was so ready to go that when I had false labor contractions I was excited and grateful to have something--anything!--happening, and I was truly disappointed when they stopped. This time, I was kind of hoping they would. I thought I was ready, but maybe I'm not so much, though at this point it's a little late to be wondering if I'm ready for another one! One other thing that I think helped last time I think was that we had the crib in our room for probably close to a month, and I think that helped me to adjust and prepare.
So, am I crazy or is this normal . . . even a little bit? Cause I feel kind of silly to be getting scared this late in the game.
1 comment:
Don't worry, you're pretty normal. Just about everyone I know, first baby or sixth, has a least a little apprehension once it actually sinks in that you'll have one more--particularly thinking about going through labor AGAIN. The transition from one to two (at least for me) isn't really any harder than from none to one, I don't think. You get used to having both hands full all the time pretty quick, and you just accept that between the two of them, you probably just won't ever sleep again, and that's ok:) Buckle, say a pray and try to relax (try--I lay no blame at your feet if you don't succeed). You'll do great!
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